Confidence After 50: Busting 5 Myths That Keep Women Playing Small

The other morning I was standing in my kitchen—top knot barely holding on, leggings stretched a little tighter than I’d like, coffee on its third reheat—staring at the scale like it had personally betrayed me.

Because here's the truth: I’ve gained 30 pounds during my perimenopause journey.

And as a certified health coach and fitness trainer? That number has messed with my head more than I care to admit.

I know the science. I coach women through this exact thing every single day. But when it’s your body . . . when it’s your jeans not buttoning, and you’re supposed to be the one who has "all the answers!"

It’s humbling. It’s heavy. And yeah—it chips away at your confidence.

I often feel judged. Sometimes I feel like a fraud. And I’ve questioned if I still get to take up space in this industry while not looking like the "after" photo.

But here’s what I also know: confidence isn’t a pant size. And it sure as hell isn’t something you earn by being perfect.

Midlife shakes the foundation—and not just hormonally. Your body changes, your identity shifts, and all the tools you used to rely on might not work the same way anymore.

That doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means you’re in a new season.

So sis, let’s bust the biggest myths about confidence in midlife, and take back our power, one (messy, imperfect, strong-as-hell) step at a time.

Myth #1: Confidence Comes From How You Look

Truth: Confidence comes from how you show up, not how you measure up.

Sure, we all want to feel good in our skin. But chasing confidence through smaller jeans or a tighter tummy? That’s a never-ending game that always leaves us feeling behind. Real confidence comes from making choices that feel aligned with who you are now—not who you used to be.

Myth #2: You Should Have It All Figured Out By Now

Truth: Midlife is a reintroduction, not a wrap-up.

This season isn’t about arriving at some perfect version of you. It’s about becoming her. Confidence blooms when you stop expecting that you should have it all together by now, and start trusting that you’re allowed to evolve.

Myth #3: Confidence Means You’re Never Insecure

Truth: Confidence is walking into the room even while that voice tells you are are not worthy. 

Spoiler alert: Everyone is insecure sometimes. But confident women don’t let self-doubt stop them from showing up, speaking up, and trying again. Confidence is a practice, not a personality trait.

Myth #4: It’s Too Late To Change

Truth: Midlife is the perfect time to rewrite your story.

Whether it's your health, your career, or your mindset, you are not too late, too old, or too far gone. Confidence grows every time you choose courage over comfort, giving you the power to rewrite what you thought was possible.

Myth #5: You Have To Do It Alone

Truth: Confidence thrives in community.

The strongest, most confident women I know? They’re not lone wolves. They surround themselves with other women who lift them up, keep it real, and remind them who they are when they forget. Don’t isolate yourself!  Stay connected. I promise you thrive when you are part of an amazing tribe! 

Confidence after 50 isn’t about pretending you’ve got it all together. It’s about finally letting go of the pressure to be someone you’re not.

It’s messy. It’s beautiful. And it’s yours to claim.

So here’s your permission slip to stop shrinking—and start owning the room, the moment, and your midlife magic.

You’re not behind. You’re just getting started.

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Want to feel more confident in your skin, your choices, and this season of life? Download my FREE Thriving in Midlife Bundle.  Three powerful eBooks to help you navigate menopause, embrace your best self, and ask the right questions about your health

(And hey—if you’re ready to go deeper, my book “Navigating Menopause” is packed with real talk, tools, and truth bombs to help you take your power back. You’ll get a special offer after you grab your guide!)